Hearts and bandages

Yes, I had my first party in my apartment today. Well, the party itself was held in our common room, since my apartment wasn’t big enough for over 10 people.

I felt dizzy after the first half of my cider. And I get serious headaches from alcohol. I should consider to refuse drinking instead. Or maybe alcohol isn’t made for Chinese people. I wasn’t really drunk; sometimes I became all naive and complaint about my looks (like I usually do as soon as I’m in touch with alcohol), huggled with almost everyone and was talking very fast and loudly, arguing with my best friend, but sometimes my mind was pretty clear.

My guests gave me some very neat moving-in-gifts: Soap, a duck to keep the soap in (it’s so cute!), chocolate (yummy), a bouquet of plastic roses (you read my mind, I usually kill cactis), a very beautiful bouquet of real flowers (it was tough to find a vase for it, but in the end I used the wasabi nuts bottle, extra credits to myself for being so clever), a bubble machine (it was difficult to make bubbles with it, but I think I know the secret techniques now) and a whiteboard with markers. Thank you so much, everyone.

Let’s see… Well, they played this systematic game that I’ve already tried from the summercamp, so I was going mad when they couldn’t let it go two hours after they started with this game. I don’t understand it. And they refuse to tell me. Stupids. I’ll never speak with them again unless they tell me right away.

I’d like to thank all of you who were present at my party:

Maral, you’re awesome, girl ;D
Lin, you’re the cutest, and thank you for persuading Lumi to tag along
Lumi, for letting yourself be persuaded by Lin
Karolina, for participating all the way from the south (I know it wasn’t the case, but well… it sounds so good :D), you know you’re very cute
Rickard, for keep telling us you’re good-looking, haha
Michael, for all your funny jokes that have entertained me when I was bored to death with your tiny brother
Sessh, for not understanding the systematic game so I didn’t have to be the last stupid one standing
Oskar, for participating all the way from the north (I know it wasn’t the case either, but… it still sounds good!)
Mike, for being my cousin four months before my birth
Daniel, you’ll always be my childhood friend
Albin, for being my best friend
Tobias, for turning 19. We’re the same age now, sweetie. Happy birthday~!

Couldn’t find any better hairstyle. No one thinks it looks like me except for the height. I’m not that short…

So I finally managed to gather all my courage to write my first e-mail to Henry. I really, really want to upload his video on YouTube, but I feel that I have to ask for his permission first. He replied the same day (:D!): “Do I have any choice :P?” I laughed a bit. And I uploaded the video.

He’s actually quite a dancer. I wonder why he’s so embarrassed about it.

My friend Lisa came to Gothenburg this week and stayed at my place, from Monday to Wednesday. I’ve really missed her so it was great being able to hang out with her. We went shopping and we bought all-day-tickets to Liseberg (the biggest amusement park in Scandinavia, not very big though comparing to the rest of the world). She was so scary when she became a great monster of adrenaline and took onto the highest and most challenging rides. And she called me a wimp when I refused to try them out because of my acrophobia. I hate it when roller-coasters go all upside down or straight down with an angle of less than 90°. All in all, my fears for almost everything tell me to go riding the merry-go-round with the other kids. Okay, I’m a wimp.

I’ve decided to learn to eat hot stuff. I have to boost up my bravery. I’m going to make Tom yum goong tonight (without the goong = shrimp, though). I’m sure that I won’t make it, so I invited a couple of guests to eat it up. Then I’ll make instant miso soup instead.

I bought them from Hung Fat trading yesterday. I’ve been looking for the miso soup (the one to the left) for almost a year! The Tom yum paste looks scary.

Back from summercamp 2007! I love camp. I blogged with notepad during this week (since I didn’t have any Internet), and I decided to paste it here.

Sunday July 15th – The weather in Gothenburg is finally getting better, maybe because I’m leaving.
So I’m on my way now to the camp. But the train took off way too late because SJ (the Swedish railway) doesn’t like to be on time. My expectations for this camp are very simple. I wish to introduce God to all members of the SCCC just by serving. And I’ll serve them well.
Our speaker Henry Wan is a very nice guy.

Monday July 16th – The registration was chaotic and the opening ceremony tense. Me and Jocke have the oldest juniors, they seem like a nice group. So tired.

Tuesday July 17th – I’m jealous of Henry who only needs to be in our late night meetings for about 30 minutes. I want to become a speaker.

Wednesday July 18th – Our group is wonderful except for one girl who refuses anything. She thinks the camp is a hotel. And my kite won’t fly. I’m so tired of fighting. But Billy gave me energy by praying for me. Thanks.
Henry “breakdanced” today during workshops. I videotaped and took pictures of him.
We built an Oolong kite. It was awful so we lost. It didn’t matter much though. Our group has got team spirit now, and that’s worth losing a competition.

Thursday July 19th – I’m experiencing joy! Our group members sit together during breaks, sessions and meals. One of them decided to follow Jesus. Wohoo~! And my kite finally flies!
God listens our prayers, always. Thank you LORD!
From now on, I’ll wash dishes with joy every day.

Friday July 20th – I was so tired that I fell asleep right before worship evening. Monica woke me up.
Our second non-Christian member decided to become a Christian during the revival meeting/evening session.
I touched Henry for the first time. I’ll never wash my hands again.

Saturday July 21st – It’ll be soon over and everyone will go back, some with a whole new life, some other with God to start following. I pray that all of them will have an intimate relationship with Him, and keep it alive!
Does God have MSN or Skype?

Sunday July 22nd – I’m waiting for the train back to Gothenburg, thinking over this week. I’m just so happy I don’t know what to say. There are so many people to miss: Wenny, Simen, Johan, Monica, Leon, Jocke, Sarah… The names are so many I’m afraid that this post will be too long.

The mission team was awesome, but I think I’ll miss Henry the most. I blushed when he wrote a message on my arm.
I don’t know why, but suddenly I feel so sad. I mean, I have only known him for a week. But I have a feeling that I’ll never see him again.

Henry, you are awesome, too! I’ll never forget you either!

I also got his Chinese name:

Your name (both the Chinese and the English) will always be in my prayers.

Sometimes when I look up in the sky, I wonder how people can believe that some incidents (with a lot of luck) could have created something as beautiful as heaven. I love to look into the sky. The beautiful sight of it makes me so happy. Sometimes I also wonder why people aren’t looking and just wander around on earth without looking up. Does looking down on your feet make you happy? I become depressed when I do that.

I’ve obtained a funny website: http://www.clickclickclick.com/. Click it and start clicking for your country! For those who are interested, Sweden is on the 15th place. Taiwan and Japan are on first and second. Go Asia!

Tomorrow (today), we’ll be going to the Olausson family in Stannum (Gråbo, Lerum, Gothenburg, Sweden). They invited us to barbeque with their neighbours. No offense, but I’m a little nervous about it. I hate sitting among Swedish grown-ups and try to look Swedish. Because even though I was born in Sweden, my looks will never tell people the same. And Swedish grown-ups are so tense. They ask you funny questions as they are expecting you to answer correctly or else you’re going to get real hurt. I don’t really know. Some parents are really nice. But his are a little scary. Especially his mother. His father is only making a joke out of everything I say. And seeing their neighbours makes me feel uneasy. And I have to buy tram-/bus card to get there. I don’t have the money for it :/.

This getting-to-bed-earlier project totally fails. It’s 04.35 AM and I’m still up blogging. I’ll go to bed right away. But since I haven’t gone to bed early, I’ve grown a zit under my nose. It’s irritating like I don’t know what. I wish I had a gun so I could kill it right away. But I guess I’ll get killed too.

If God created heaven and all of us, why did He create something as awful as zits?

Someone yelled in the corridor. That was scary.

I finally got my pins that I’ve ordered from knapp.nu. Happy! But I’m more amused of their little cat, Knatten (in Swedish). It’s a very angry cat that complains about everything that he (her/it?) doesn’t like. Anyways, I’m so satisfied with what I’ve accomplished. The pins look really trendy and good. And I’m finally all done with the gifts for leaders. This is one of the gifts for our speaker, Henry Wan:

Hope he won’t find this blog before the camp… But I just had to show off my beautiful work.

I’m getting more and more irritating about any small problems. I don’t like it. And I’m becoming more and more egoistic. I like it less. I really don’t know what to do. It feels like what Tizian said during preparation camp disappeared. I have to guard myself from things like this. From now on, discipline!

WordPress has a lot of funny functions. For example, it informs you about incoming links, how many clicks there are and how people got to my blog by searching through Google (maybe all other search engines, too?). I found some funny search engine terms:

bilder på världens bästa kulspruta
se undernärd ut
låtar + chess

Okey, the third one is understandable, but what…? Undernärd (undernourished)? And kulspruta (machine gun)? Does Google says that I have any of these in my blog, or what is wrong with the search engines nowadays? I’m far from undernourished and I don’t do machine guns. I don’t even have one. I think it’s forbidden to obtain such weapons at home in Sweden.

I’ve been stuck to this certain livejournal for almost a week now. I don’t know why, but I just can’t get it off my head. It’s as if it was my own. The writer has just taken the thoughts off my brain and but them in words. I feel so close, yet so far away from her.

Maybe it’s because she’s also Chinese, but I feel that I can identify myself in almost all her entries. All her worries, her thoughts, her humour, her feelings… I almost feel the same. The only difference between us is that she already has gone through (or is getting used to be in) all those situations while I’m still in them. And that she’s two years older. And that she has both her parents living together and having a restaurant (like most Chinese middle-aged and older people). My parents divorced when I was very young, now mum’s working at a café while my father retired too young (I think he was about 40ish). Sometimes I dislike my parents as much as she does. It’s not as much with my mum nowadays, but I’m having major communication problems with my father.

I have actually met her boyfriend Björn. Twice. But I’ve never met her. I wonder why she won’t come to the southern parts of Sweden since she doesn’t have many places to go to up in the very north. Winter would be a little warmer here, too. I’d like to meet her. I’m sure we won’t talk much, if at all, but despite that, I’m so looking forward to seeing her. I think I like her without any reasons. It’s as her livejournal tells me what to do so that I won’t walk on the same wrong path that she took. I’m not sure. By the way, she seems very cute and not as fat as she says in her livejournal. I bet that she’s just overreacting. Her boyfriend, on the other hand, looks really… nerdy. I do mean nerdy. Very. But since he’s also so cool, I named my Bukowski-teddy Buffi (which is Björn’s nickname).

I can also tell you that I have two reasons of starting to blog in English:
1) To internationalize it and to improve my English
2) To become as good as Cookie in English

And I still haven’t got laid.

I’ve been thinking for a long time now, and I’ve finally made a couple of decisions:

1) Start blogging in English since the Internet is so international
2) Stop thinking too much
3) Start to appreciate myself more, or else I won’t be loved
4) Get better at expressing my thoughts and opinions about things
5) Become dead serious with college (university)
6) Leave things be and let time decide when it’s time for them to happen
7) Appreciate the ones that love me, meaning, less thinking about myself
8) Fully rely on God (F.R.O.G.)
9) Show more love to my family, since I won’t be seeing them as much
10) Stop whining and demanding more about what I’ve already got
11) Eat more healthy and less hamburgers
12) Listen carefully to what people have to say instead of trying my fulliest to get them to understand my thoughts
13) Let Albin be

These are a few things of the things that I’ve been thinking about. Really, there’s more, but these are the most important things. And I guess it took a long time to make these decisions.

When I was on my way home, I saw an elder woman on a bicycle. She moaned while bicycling. She actually, really, literally moaned. I felt disgusted. What if I start moaning while walking in about 30 years?

I also saw a man walking in the middle of a road. I mean it, it was in the middle. If he was trying to commit suicide, I bet he failed. And a couple of small guys were picking up a fight with an older man. I felt sorry for the man. He looked bored.

I’ve just got my first reply from the university application I got on 237th place in Laws, and got into the English teacher’s and French (advanced grade). I decided to say ‘yes, thank you’ to them all. Another decision made. But not really a tough one, though. So now I’ll just wait again. For the second reply.

Less than a week to the camp! I’m so looking forward to it. Yann Tsui is in my group! She’s the cutest. I’d love to have her in my group.

Denna natt har jag quizzat. Jag borde gå och lägga mig istället, skaffa en normal dygnsrytm så jag inte dör på lägret på grund av för lite sömn. Och så lovade jag att jag skulle ta hand om Christian imorgon. Han har stukat foten. Jag kan inte åka dit hur sent som helst. Han behöver mat och sånt. Hur som helst, här är resultaten från quizzarna:

lendai säger att det stämmer bra på mig. Vad tycker ni? Jag har lite svårt att bestämma mig för hur jag ska förhålla mig till detta resultat, för jag känner inte mig själv så bra. Jag vet bara att jag är väldigt bortskämd. Och krävande. Och jobbig.

Jag är rätt manlig för att vara tjej. Till och med Michael fick färre poäng än jag. Med andra ord är jag manligare än en 36-årig skäggig halvgrekisk man. Och jag valde inte ens öl.

Jag är för okvinnlig för att vara tjej, tydligen. Nu fick Michael plötsligt runt 40 poäng mer poäng än jag. Jag vet inte vad jag ska säga…

Nä, dags att sova nu. Vända tillbaka på dygnet, det får bli veckans projekt. Ska på möte på torsdag (imorgon) också. Klockan 8. Ja, åtta på morgonen. Och nej, jag ska inte vara vaken till klockan 8. Jag ska skaffa normal dygnsrytm. Normal!

I Oslo var jag och min vän Johan ute på stan en enda gång. Vi var inne i en inredningsdesignbutik och hittade väldigt söta saker som de här:

Kan du gissa vad det är för nåt? En juicepress! Formad som en söt kines. Jag ville verkligen köpa den. Men den kostade 246 NOK…

Min absoluta favorit: en äggkopp! Kepsen används som saltkar, och huvudet är självaste äggkoppen, åh, så himla sött <3! 160 NOK dock :(.

Designern heter Stefano Giovannoni för er som undrar… Han har designat en massa annat sött också, allt från tandpetarställ till korthållare.

Lite andra saker som jag hittade var ett par roliga t-shirtar. Kolla in trycket, liksom:

Man börjar undra om inte det kryllar av feminister i Oslo… Men jag garvade rätt länge åt dem ändå :P. Den andra är lätt bäst.

Vi spelade lite Nintendo Wii också. Rayman vs The Rabbits. Jag slog rekordet på minispelet “Bunnies can’t slide”. Spelet går ut på att det finns fyra personer som står på varsin curlingboll i varsitt hörn och ska skjutas så nära som möjligt mot mittpunkten. Jag tog andraplatsen efter flertalet försök. Jag som bara siktade på att ta tredjeplatsen på 4.20 meter… Äkta kines :D.

Haha, man kan se mina ben på TV-rutans reflektioner. Funny stuff.

Sen önskar jag att jag var lika bra som hon på att rita:

Den finns inne i Leon Ho’s sovrum, där jag fick sova medan han var borta i Trondheim. Ritad av en norska som heter Hannah-nånting. Hm, don’t mind the light, though :/. Jag är ingen kameramänniska, varken framför eller bakom kameran, tro det eller ej, även om många faktiskt tror att jag är det (för att jag är asiat, duuh!).

Ah well, Oslo i alla fall. I approve. Åka dit igen en vacker dag. Även om det innebär död för min plånbok. En hamburgare med nice price på Birger King kostar 15 NOK. Enligt mina beräkningar är det omkring 18 SEK. That’s outrageous (Lumi ;D)!